Buy the Ticket, Take the Ride
They want you to forget. We're building a museum to make sure you never can.
You can smell it in the air, can’t you? That sour, cloying stench of history being rewritten in real-time. It’s the smell of burnt truth and cheap propaganda. While you were busy trying to keep your head above water, the grifters and charlatans got to work with their erasers and their Sharpies, convinced they could memory-hole the whole damn thing.
We’ve all seen the reports coming out of Washington. The Smithsonian, our nation’s attic, is being ransacked by political hacks who want to scrub it clean of anything that might offend their delicate, “patriotic” sensibilities. The Kennedy Center, a living memorial, is being hijacked. This isn’t just politics; it’s a coordinated assault on our collective memory. They want a history that is all gleaming marble and triumphant myths. A story scrubbed clean of the cruelty, the corruption, and the sheer, mind-bending absurdity of the last decade.
They want you to forget.
We are here to make sure you never can.
If the traditional institutions are either too compromised or too timid to tell the whole story, then we have to build a new one. A monument to the madness. A sanctuary of savage truth.
Welcome to The Trumpsonian.
This isn’t your grandmother’s museum. There will be no polite placards or quiet, contemplative halls. This is a full-throated, immersive, and brutally satirical pop-up experience designed to chronicle the controversies, scandals, and spectacular failures of the Donald Trump years. We are taking the proven, viral model of sensations like the Museum of Ice Cream and injecting it with the political urgency of this moment.
We are building the cultural resistance - one golden toilet at a time.
Imagine it: A 90-day run in Los Angeles, a warehouse transformed into a fever dream of recent history. You’ll step into a world where you can:
Hurl digital ketchup at a projection of Fox News in a replica of the White House dining room.
Pose for a selfie with Top Secret documents artfully arranged in a Mar-a-Lago bathroom.
Pull the lever on a giant slot machine that only pays out in bankruptcies and unpaid contractor invoices.
Put on a headset and step directly into the chaos of the January 6th insurrection in a visceral VR experience that will leave you shaken to your core.
This is a journey through spectacle and chaos, designed to be both hilarious and horrifying. It’s a place to process the trauma, laugh at the absurdity, and get angry all over again.
But this is more than just a spectacle. It is a mission-driven enterprise. The Trumpsonian is entertainment with a purpose. We are a for-profit venture with a crucial charitable commitment: we are pledging 10% of all net proceeds to Run for Something, an organization dedicated to recruiting and supporting the next generation of young, diverse, progressive leaders.
Every ticket, every share, every laugh, and every gasp of outrage will help fuel the very political change we so desperately need.
This Substack is where it all begins. It is our dispatch from the front lines, the blueprint for this act of defiance. By subscribing, you’re not just an observer; you’re a co-conspirator. You’ll get the behind-the-scenes reports, the unfiltered commentary, the first look at our darkly satirical rewards, and a ringside seat as we build this beautiful, unhinged, and necessary thing.
The hour is late. The bastards are tireless. But the truth still has teeth if you’re willing to bite.
Welcome to the conspiracy. Let’s get to work.